Being women is not only being pretty and nice and fragile and put a lot of make-up in yourself. You must be feminine and I scare be, because is not connected with my minds and feelings about be women and I am women. So I start working on this points that all this feelings and minds are only in my head and now I see, that I can see myself like a women and I'm proud on myself. I work on myself that I writing about this problems and give me new chance and change thoughts with more supportive. When I write, I realise that all my minds are only in my head and this is not only prediction, but realisation. Also I see that this hard work that I think my dad give me, is also work for women. And almost all works are for both sex. Now I work in the factory and here in my section was a years ago works only men, but now works men and women. So tough work is for women too. And being women is not what you work but how you feel and how you live your femininity.
So if you think that other don't see you enough feminine is probably because you don't see yourself like a women. Then you must look why you don't see yourself like a women. And look deep in you like me, where problem is. Maybe is only that you don't believe in yourself or not love yourself enough. I'm not sure if I love enough myself, but I know, that I want be person that love myself the most. And how to do that? See yourself who you are and not what you think you are. I have problem with this. I don't see myself who I really am, but this is because, I don't yet believe in myself. But how I can change this. The same like since now. Be with myself, take care on myself, look what I really want and who I really am and don't listen other people what they want to tell me about myself, because they told me what they see in me and this is not me, but their perspective on me and how they see me. So take care on yourself and know, that you are what you live.
It take a time that I realise that. I hope, that I help you, because I told you this. And yes I have now short hair, wear like before, but I love myself more than before and live like a women. And I like it. And for the end. Being women is being you, behave like you and feel like you. I need time to see myself like a women, so I hope, that this blog help you to find yourself sooner than I'm.
Dolgo časa sem mislila, da nisem prava ženska, in ko sem končno spoznala in rekla, ženska sem, sem skoraj jokala zaradi tega spoznanja. To je bil zame velik korak in to je zato, ker se nisem počutila kot ženska dolgo časa. Mislila sem namreč, da si oči želi sina in z mano cel čas ravna kot s sinom, in zato sem nazadnje to, da nisem prava ženska, verjela. Imela sem dolge lase, prsi, menstruacijo in druge ženstvene stvari, vendar se še vedno nisem počutila kot ženska.
Biti ženska ni samo biti lep, prijazen in krhek ter imeti na sebi veliko make-upa. Moraš biti ženstvena in jaz sem se bala biti ženstvena, ker se nisem povezala z mojimi mislimi in čustvi o tem, kako biti ženska in da jaz sem ženska. Zato sem začela delati na teh točkah, in sicer, da so vse te misli in čustva samo v moji glavi in sedaj vidim, da se lahko vidim kot žensko in sem ponosna na sebe. Na sebi sem delala tako, da sem pisala o teh mojih problemih in si dala novo priložnost in spremenila misli v bolj podporne. Ko sem pisala sem ugotovila, da so resnično vse moje misli samo v moji glavi in to ni samo predvidevanje, ampak spoznanje. Poleg tega sem tudi spoznala, da je to delo, ki mi ga je dal oči in za katerega sem mislila, da je težko, moško delo primerno tudi za ženske. In v resnici so skoraj vsa dela za oba spola. Sedaj delam v tovarni, kjer so v mojem oddelku pred nekaj leti delali samo moški, sedaj pa delajo tako ženske kot moški. Torej so težka dela tudi za ženske. In biti ženska ni kaj delaš, ampak kako se počutiš in kako živiš svojo ženstvenost.
Torej če misliš, da drugi ne vidijo dovolj ženstvenosti v tebi je verjetno zato, ker ti sama ne vidiš sebe kot ženska. V takem primeru moraš pogledati, zakaj se ne vidiš kot ženska. In pogledati moraš globoko v sebe, tako kot sem jaz, kje je problem. Mogoče je samo to, da ne verjameš v sebe in se nimaš dovolj rada. Niti zase nisem prepričana če se imam dovolj rada, vendar vem, da želim biti oseba, ki se ima najbolj rada. In kako to narediti? Tako, da vidiš sebe, kdo si in ne kdo misliš da si. S tem sem imela probleme. Nisem videla kdo sem v resnici in to je zato, ker nisem verjela vase. Vendar sedaj lahko to spremenim. In to na enak način, ko sem spreminjala do sedaj. Biti s seboj, paziti nase, videti kaj si resnično želim in kdo v resnici sem, ter ne poslušati drugih, kaj želijo povedati o meni, ker drugi mi povedo kaj vidijo na meni in to nisem jaz, ampak njihova perspektiva mene in kako me oni vidijo. Zato skrbite zase in vedite, da ste tisto kar živite.
Da sem prišla do te ugotovitve je bil potreben čas. Upam, da sem vam pomagala, ko sem vam to povedala. In seveda, sedaj imam kratke lase, se oblačim kot prej, vendar se imam raje kot prej in živim kot ženska. In vse to mi je všeč. Za konec pa še. Biti ženska je biti ti, obnašati se po tvoje in čutiti po tvoje. Potrebovala sem čas, da sem se videla kot ženska, zato upam, da bo ta blog pomagal, da boš našla sebe hitreje, kot sem našla jaz sebe.
